- Lynnette Canedy: Good morning, Dad. [kisses]
Morning.
Are you doing okay?
- Thomas Canedy: Mm, good morning.
- Lynnette: I had a dream just recently
where some people came to get Dad,
and they said that I wasn't taking really good care of him.
And they took his bed out with him in it
and I was begging them not to.
I cried so much that I woke myself up crying.
You remember I told you, today I'm gonna be going to New York
for Jordan's graduation?
Junior and Kim and Caprese are gonna be taking care of you
while I'm gone, okay?
You know, I'm going on vacation Monday
and will stay through Sunday,
which is the longest time I've been away from Dad...
I can't even remember.
Just every time you turn him for the hip daily,
you know, just check it and just make sure it looks okay.
I'm excited because I love New York.
I haven't hung out with my older sister in a while.
Get to see an old friend while I'm in town.
And sleep, I get to sleep through the night.
So all those things are wonderful.
Will I relax?
I don't know.
Can you just hold the phone up to his ear?
- Sure, I will. - Okay.
Little bit nervous about leaving him.
- Huh, you know he's well taken care of.
- Oh, that's not it.
I just...
Afraid he's not gonna remember me when I get back.
Like remember when he didn't remember you the other day?
- Mm-hmm.
- He's not the same person that he once was.
I don't know with his dementia,
what his mind is thinking throughout the day.
We don't hear much of his voice anymore.
You comfortable, Dad?
- Mm-hmm. - Okay.
So getting close to him kind of helps me
feel like I'm having that connection with him.
It's just hard to see life in him,
and I'm trying to get something that maybe isn't there.
[both laugh]
I just can't imagine anyone taking better care of him
than I am.
Dad, are you full, or do you want more sandwich?
- More sandwich. - Lynnette: Okay, good.
Junior's got more sandwich for you, Dad.
All right, give him a big ol' piece.
[both laugh] Okay.
- I think I been doing this long enough,
I know what to give him. - I know,
but I was just, like, "Wow."
Two weeks ago, maybe,
my brother was here helping me with Dad.
And my brother said, "Hey, Dad, do you know who I am?"
And he said, "Yeah, my wife."
And it just broke my heart.
It scares me to be away from him for that long.
[sighing]
Because we have such a routine,
I'm afraid that he's gonna forget me.
Remember I told you, I'm gonna be going to New York
so I can see Jordan graduate? - Thomas: Mm.
- Okay, I'm gonna be leaving in just a little bit
for the airport, okay? - Mm.
- Got it? - Mm-hmm.
- Okay.
You got the keys?
[gentle music]
Dad and I have always just had this, this closeness.
We had lots of, just, father-daughter conversations.
And I miss just hearing Dad's voice.
Just missing who he really was.
Yeah.
When I took the plane back from New York,
I had a lot of mixed emotions.
I thought, "Oh, my gosh, the fun is over."
But also, I needed to lay eyes on Dad.
I needed that acknowledgement that he remembered me.
Did I tell you I had gone to New York
and I was looking at Jordan, and Pumpkin,
spending some time with them? - Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, Jordan graduated from high school.
- Mm. - Yeah,
and Pumpkin had her birthday this past weekend.
And I gave Jordan some graduation money from you, okay?
- Mm. - I love you. [kisses]
Do you know who this is, Dad? - Mm-hmm.
- Who am I? - Lynnette.
- Aw. [kisses]
I love you so much.
When he said my name, it sounded like Dad again.
You know, like my old dad.
Just kind of matter-of-fact.
Okay?
And that's all I needed.
It's all I needed.
[gentle music]
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