- Due to language and adult situations,
the following film is intended for mature audiences
and not suitable for children.
Viewer discretion is advised.
? ?
(wind howling)
(ambient music)
(waves sloshing)
(dramatic music)
(water bubbling)
- [Woman] Did you see it?
(waves rumbling)
- [Man] Next stop, Silver River.
(pleasant guitar music)
? We ain't going home, we ain't going home ?
? We ain't ever going home ?
? We ain't going home, we ain't going home ?
? We ain't ever going home ? (groaning)
? We ain't going home, we ain't going home ?
? We ain't ever going home ?
? We ain't going home, we ain't going home ?
? We ain't ever going home ?
(pleasant music)
? We ain't going home, we ain't going home ?
? We ain't ever going home ?
? We ain't going home, we ain't going home ?
? We ain't ever going home ?
? We ain't going home, we ain't going home ?
? We ain't ever going home ?
- Father Rob?
? We ain't going home, we ain't going home ?
? We ain't ever going home ?
(pleasant music)
- Ladies and Gentleman of St. Anthony's Parish,
many of you may remember the Sullivan family,
who were a part of our flock for many years.
Well, today we'd like to welcome back
Daniel Sullivan from St. Patrick's Seminary,
whom Bishop Byrnes has
graciously sent us to support Father Rob and our parish
during this challenging time.
Father?
- Yeah.
Thank you.
I have a very distinct memory of the reception
after Daniel's first communion,
when water started flooding out
from under the bathroom door, right back there.
(laughing)
I went in to find Jacob, Christopher,
and Danny, plunger in hand,
all with great, guilty looks on their faces.
(people chuckling)
I would never have guessed
that any of those rascals
would still remember the Hail Mary
by the time they were old enough to drive.
(people laughing)
So, to me,
this is nothing short of a miracle
to have one of them return to our flock
as a fellow clergyman.
Who knows?
Maybe he'll even back to stay.
So let's give him a warm welcome.
(applauding)
- So you excited to be back then?
- Oh, thank you.
Well, to tell you the truth,
I was gonna go on a mission trip to Haiti in the spring
before my ordination.
So, I wasn't planning on--
- 10 degree weather?
- Where's this other Sullivan boy?
Father Rob says we're lucky to have
"another Sullivan boy back."
- Danny, Bart Sheraski.
One of our biggest local job creators.
Owns the river mill.
- Just a little family company.
- Nice to meet you, Mr. Sheraski.
- Dan's brother, Chris, lives in town.
- Jake is the one.
- Oh, Christ.
Sorry.
Jake.
- What's Jake up to?
- I really have no idea.
- Shouldn't he be here to welcome you?
- We don't keep in touch.
- Well, you've had your nose in the books though, right?
The guy's working--
- Young Daniel tells me
he hasn't seen his brother, Jake, in years.
It's odd for a clergyman
to be cut out from his family, isn't it?
- Well, I'm sure he's looking forward
to seeing him again very soon.
- Sure, if I have time before I go back to Milwaukee.
- Head back.
And you're not ordained yet, are you?
Sorry, I thought you said that--
- So, Father Rob and I are hoping that once--
(sighing)
- I think she's pitching them the dream.
You know, hometown hero comes back.
Prodigal son, all that stuff.
She's been working Sheraski for like a year.
Some big endowment.
- I see.
Do you have any idea what Jake is up to nowadays?
- Saw him at the bait shop a couple months ago.
Haven't seen him in church in ages
but if you find him, tell him I said 'hi'.
He was a good student.
Both of them were.
- Thank you, Mr. Marx.
- Call me Tom.
(somber piano music)
(phone dial beeping)
- [phone operator recording] The number you have dialed
has been changed, disconnected or is no longer in service.
If you feel you have reached this recording in error,
please hang up.
(dramatic instrumental music)
(door closing)
(wind howling)
(bike gears cranking)
- Excuse me.
Do you know where Father Rob's room is?
(heart monitor beeping)
- [Elderly Woman] Take that.
- Nah.
Oh, and just start with half.
Those are pretty strong.
See you later, Grandma.
- She's not your grandma.
- Oh, Danny.
I thought maybe you should stick to the liturgical stuff.
But if you want, I'd love to have you do more.
You could do some readings.
The Gospel.
Then, maybe after a few weeks,
I'll have you do a communion service on your own.
Homily and everything.
- Father, I'm flattered, thank you
but I think I'd prefer not.
- What?
- I'm sorry, nothing.
- You'd prefer not?
- Um...
I'd prefer not to get ahead of myself,
I guess.
Sorry, I got.
- Sally has a list of the people you should visit.
Try to see them on Saturdays or Sundays if you can.
- No problem.
- Why do I get a sense you don't wanna be here?
- Father,
I don't
really have people here
since my folks left town.
My friends grew up.
- And Jacob?
What?
You think you can just show up here for a few weeks,
light some candles, dish out communion,
and then scoot on back to Milwaukee by Easter?
Oh, Daniel.
When you commit to a life in Christ,
you surrender yourself to powers beyond your control.
Whatever God's reasons may be,
you're here now
and you must accept that.
Now let us pray.
- [Both] Our Father, Who art in heaven
Hallowed be Thy Name.
(dramatic instrumental music)
- Oh!
(groaning)
(truck engine rumbling)
- [Woman] Danny?
- [Danny] You look different.
- Thanks?
(chuckling)
- Sorry, I can't believe you're still here in town.
- No, neither can I.
I mean, I left for awhile but.
Put your leg up.
(faint beat music)
Look, I'm gonna finish a blowout
but if you can hang, I'll give you a ride.
- Okay. - Yeah?
Okay.
(hairdryer buzzing)
So that's your dream, then?
Is to become a priest?
And then a bishop
and then the pope?
- Well, I want to
help people overcome their spiritual burdens
through Christ's teachings.
- That's so cool. (giggling)
- Thanks.
A right on Maple.
- Let me do a little detour. (tires screeching)
- Where are we?
- Most people in this town,
they have such a narrow view of what's possible.
They don't really go too far.
I bet you'll be bishop.
Stick with it.
(faint pop music)
? Can't take it with you ?
? On the same street ?
? Can't take it with you ?
- This?
Right now?
- Come on.
Let's say hi.
- I'm gonna.
I gotta pee.
(sighing)
Who brought those?
- He was popular.
- You still
come here
after six years?
- Seven.
Yeah.
He was my first.
My horoscope told me
that I was gonna receive an unexpected visitor.
- Me?
- What's your sign?
- When's your birthday?
- [Danny] May 2nd.
- So you're Taurus, the bull.
Stubborn, private.
But dependable, trustworthy.
- What's his?
- Scorpio.
Magnetic.
Unpredictable.
- Makes sense. Middle child.
- Class clown. - Maniac.
(laughing)
- Yeah. - And yours?
- Aquarius.
The Water Bearer.
Charming,
free-willed.
Contradictory.
(chuckling)
- Sounds about right.
(laughing)
- I really,
I missed you guys.
- You seen Jake? - Yeah.
- Where?
- Try his place. [sniffles]
- I don't--
- You don't know where he lives?
So you guys don't--
- We're different people than we used to be.
(chuckling)
- No.
You're just wearing different costumes.
Nettleton Road.
Dirt driveway.
Past the rusted-out car in the ditch.
(door creaking)
(engine rumbling)
- ####.
Whoa.
(banging)
(tires squealing)
(muffled music)
(gunshot booming)
- [Jake] Mother######!
- Get up!
Come over here, I got a present for you!
- I'm all set. Thanks.
(door creaking)
- What the hell are you doing?
You disappear on us for a year.
Mom doesn't even know where you are
and I gotta find out where you live from Chris' ex?
- I disappear?
I never left.
You're the one who ran away,
so don't come in here with your #### hanging out!
- I'm here for a month.
[breathing heavily]
Two, maybe.
I'm doing stuff with the church.
I'm not trying to get in your face, man.
I just need you to
come to mass
a couple times
and just talk to people.
They just need to see that we're good guys
and that the church is in good hands.
Whatever.
- Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay. (chuckling)
No, I get it.
It's like I'm a, [bottles clinking]
what do you call it?
I'm like a... [pops cap off]
...a merit badge.
- Family's important.
I don't wanna screw this up.
I'm getting ordained in May.
- No ####.
- What do you say, Sunday?
See you there?
- Not even a little foreplay
before you bend me over here, eh?
- Come on.
Please.
Maybe there's something you'd like to pray for
(Jake chuckling)
or ask forgiveness for?
- Jesus Christ. - Stop saying that.
- Man, you are completely brainwashed.
- I'm not brainwashed!
- You used to hate this ####.
You even took communion home with you from mass one time
and you burned it.
- It's because it's different when you're a kid, man.
It's different when you're not a kid.
Sorry I bothered you.
Forget it, I'll go.
[door creaks]
- Hey, hey.
Danny!
Just, will you just?
All right, stay, come in.
Or.
Take a seat.
(plucking guitar)
- You been playing?
- Most days.
That and Mario Kart.
(strumming)
Yeah, won't.
Hey, will you just put that down?
Put it down.
The strings are a little brittle.
- Yeah, no ####.
It's freezing in here.
- Out of fire wood.
Speaking of which,
what you up to tomorrow?
- Cutting firewood.
(bird squawking)
What the?
- Lumberjack style.
Come on.
- I could probably get us a chainsaw.
- [Jake] No chainsaws.
- Why? Too loud.
- The whole point of fire wood
is so I don't have to give money to fracking and ####.
- What about driving?
- It's a necessary evil.
- [Danny] Here we go.
- Nah, this ####'s rotten.
Up here.
Hey,
do you remember the time
we caught a garter snake
and you stabbed it to death with a screwdriver?
And then you threw it into the Thompsons' yard.
#### stank.
- Yeah, why?
- Or what about the time you got in a fight on the bus
with Randy Lipvak?
But you were too small to beat him up,
so instead, you told him you were glad his mom was dead.
- Yeah.
- You were a nasty little bastard.
- I remember stuff about you, too.
- [Jake] Oh, yeah?
Indulge me.
- Do you remember that time when you were, like, seven
and Dad sent Chris to bed without any dinner
and then you saved half of yours in a napkin
and brought it up to him?
I think the sweetest thing you ever did though
was when you got the entire 5th grad class
to make Valentines for people at the nursing home.
I bet they were really touched.
You ever go by there anymore?
- Oh, yeah.
Old chicks dig me.
Well, come on, tree's not gonna cut itself.
- Dude.
There's a reason this #### is obsolete, man.
- They clear cut the whole country with this.
We can cut this little branch, here.
- [Danny] Okay. - Pull.
Pull.
Don't push, I'll pull.
####!
Goddamn it.
- Well.
If it isn't the future Father Sullivan.
Is that Chris, uh, Jacob?
- Yeah.
- Hi, Jake.
- Hi, Mr. Marx.
- This isn't bio class, fellas.
Call me Tom, all right?
What's up?
- Do you have a chainsaw that we could barrow?
- Sure I do.
I'll tell you what,
make you a bargain.
You boys come join Jeanne and I
for brunch this weekend after church,
you can use the chainsaw as much as you want.
- Sounds good to me.
Jake?
- Sure.
- [Tom] All right.
Come on.
Jake, you catch anything lately?
- Just a nasty case of the crabs.
- You know what I mean.
- A few northern, some perch.
- [Tom] I hear there's some walleye biting too.
- Not by my spot.
- Where is that anyway?
(chuckling)
Good man.
(chainsaw rumbling)
(chainsaw sputtering)
(chainsaw buzzing)
(fire crackling)
(somber music)
(school commotion)
(groaning)
- I left my math homework at home, but Mom's not there.
I need the truck. - [Danny] No way.
I'm going off campus.
- [Chris] I need it by fifth hour or I'm gonna get an F.
- [Danny] Well, then you should've remembered it.
Find a ride with somebody else.
(ominous music)
(phone chiming)
- [Jake] What?
- Nothing.
- All right, well, I gotta get into town, so.
- Oh.
So jam later?
- Yeah, maybe next time.
So, yeah,
I'll uh...
I'll stop by or something.
- All right.
(chuckling)
It's been so long.
- Been awhile.
[Jake clears throat]
Oh, and hey, yeah,
thanks for helping me out today.
You know, you really handle wood like a pro.
[on radio] ? Why do you hurt me so ?
? Leaving me so all alone ?
? Why do you make me cry ?
(tires squealing)
? From you ?
? Why do you ?
(siren alarming)
? So all alone ?
? Why do you make me cry ?
- Everybody okay here?
- Yeah.
I'm really sorry.
[opens car door]
(thudding)
- Stay in the car, keep your hands still!
You have a license and registration?
- Why don't you have a license?
- Well, I don't normally drive.
- Oh, Daniel, this does not bode well.
- I went to go see Jake, like you asked.
I didn't have a ride.
- Well, you can always call me.
(chuckling)
How'd it go?
- Good.
Anything else?
- Francis brought over some music selections
and Father Rob's notes from the past three months.
- The congregational feedback forms
and next week's music are on top.
- Please think about mass.
Father Rob needs you.
The impression you make is gonna count for a lot.
- I will do my best.
(somber piano)
(church bell ringing)
(somber organ music)
(Father Rob groaning)
- [Alter Boy] Father? - It's time.
(gagging)
- Oh, fudge.
[retching]
- I need to go.
- Uh... get Francis. we'll cancel mass.
Water, water.
- No.
No.
Everyone's here.
Daniel can do it.
- Daniel? - Come on, Sullivan, step up.
- Okay. Sure, yes sir.
I'll do the service, Father.
- There's consecrated hosts in the--
- Tabernacle, I know.
- You know today's Gospel.
- Mathew, chapter two.
(chuckling)
- You got a homily prepared, too, kid?
- No, father.
- Well, make one up. [groans]
Go on, now.
- Okay, okay.
Come on, come on, come on.
- My mom said you crashed Father Rob's car.
- Uh-huh.
- And that you don't have a driver's license.
- That's right.
- How come you don't know how to drive?
- Stop talking!
Focus on the service, okay?
- Okay, sorry.
- Danny, hi.
(organ music)
- We're late, let's go.
- Good luck.
(pleasant organ music)
(congregation singing a hymn)
- Blessings of our Lord Jesus Christ
and God our Father to you all.
- [Congregation] And also to you.
- Please be seated.
Father Rob
fell under the weather at the last minute,
so he asked me to continue
with a prayer service this morning.
It is my first time, so please be gentle.
(congregation member coughing)
"John the Baptist appeared in the wilderness,
"saying, 'repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is near.
"'This is the one of whom the prophets spoke
"'when they said to straighten the pathways for the Lord.'
"So the people came to him from all around
"to be baptized by him at the Jordan River,
"and confessed their sins.
"John said "I am baptizing you with water,
"'for your repentance,
"'but the one who is coming after me is more powerful.
"'He will baptize you in the Holy Spirit, with Fire.'"
These are the words of our Lord.
- [Congregation] Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.
- Father Rob would.
I didn't really have time to uh...
When I first took the time
and read this passage on my own a couple years ago,
I thought it was strange.
Why would Jesus, the Son of God,
go get baptized by someone else?
In Matthew's Gospel, Jesus,
even though he was God's son,
knew that he was just a human too.
So even he must seek forgiveness for his own transgressions
before he could fully serve God's purpose.
What a great role model,
right?
So let's be sure to follow his example.
I want all of you, on your way out of mass this morning,
to make sure and bless yourselves with the holy water
in those basins on the wall
and ask God for his forgiveness and his guidance
before you head out of this church
and back into this day that he has given you.
We must continually prepare and purify ourselves
to be fully received into God's grace.
(pleasant organ music)
Body of Christ. - Amen.
- Body of Christ.
Body of Christ. - Amen.
- The body of Christ. - [Girl] Amen.
- Body of Christ. - Amen.
- Hi.
- Uh...
Cross, cross your... yeah.
Lord, bless Nicole
in the name of the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit.
- Oh.
- "Body of Christ?"
- But you're.
- But?
Whatever, dude.
(congregation gasping)
[smooching]
Peace be with you!
[congregation murmuring]
- Body of Christ. - Um.
Body of Christ.
- Amen.
(dial tone buzzing)
- [Jake] Hey, you missed me.
Don't leave a message because I don't check my voicemail.
(thudding)
(tires screeching)
- Where the hell were you? - What, I'm here.
- You didn't show up for the service!
I looked like an idiot!
Marx took off already.
- He said after church.
It's after.
- What, you didn't think I was gonna--
- Come to my first service ever, yeah.
- I showed up, all right?
Jesus Christ,
you think I came all the way down here
to be scrutinized by my old teacher
over some crappy waffles?
I'm just trying to help you out, bro.
Why don't you be more specific next time?
How'd it go?
(laughing)
Wanna eat?
- I'm not hungry.
- Well, if you're just gonna sit on your ass and freeze,
we might as well be catching fish.
(old-time country music on radio)
So, the other night,
I was at a bar up in Bessemer
and two priests walk into the bathroom.
- Uh-huh.
- So, they step up to the urinals
and one glances over at the other
and he sees a little square patch on the other guy's pecker
and he asks him,
"Hey, does that thing really work?"
And the other priest says,
"Oh yeah, I think so.
I'm down to three butts a day."
(thudding)
Come on.
I'm sure you got better ones.
- Easy!
How thick is it?
- [Jake] I don't know. Let's find out.
- ####!
Whooooooo!
Oh, God.
(laughing)
? ?
Regular or crispy?
- Crispy.
- Okay.
Burned them anyway.
(water sloshing)
- There we go.
- Good work.
Give me one of those.
- You've earned this.
- Good meat, good drink, good God, let's eat.
- Amen.
(sighing)
- See?
I still know how to pray.
(ice crackling)
- So do you ever?
- What?
- [Danny] Pray. - No.
- [Danny] Why not?
- Ah...
Because I don't believe in fairytales anymore.
People spend their entire lives feeling bad
and trying to dig themselves out of a bottomless pit
so they can fly away to some magical lalaland
after they die.
It's bull####.
- No, it's not.
What's wrong with treating people
how they would like to be treated
and teaching people not to steal and not to murder?
- Murder?
God is the single biggest reason people murder each other.
- He's the biggest reason that people help each other.
- He?
- Yes, schools, missions, food for the poor, charities.
- If there is a God,
He or She or It
doesn't give a rat's ass
about what goes on down here.
- Why would you say that?
- Why would he let millions of people suffer
and starve and kill each other over nothing?
Huh?
He let Christopher die for no reason.
- We have free will.
- Oh, Jesus,
don't give me that "mysterious ways" bull####!
Chris was the best one of us.
The one everyone liked.
He was good at everything.
It should've been me instead.
Or you.
- Chris got in the car with the wrong guy on the wrong day
and the seat belts were broken
and they were going 70 in a 45
and I should've let him take the ####ing truck.
[splash]
Okay?
(somber music)
There's a reason people go to confession.
They want a fresh start.
They want absolution
and God grants that.
- Oh, I know.
People love to be told that they're forgiven
and it's not their fault
when they've done something they regret.
You see,
at least I have the integrity
to accept the ###### things I've done.
Where as you--
well,
that's why you're here, isn't it?
- Ice fishing? - The church.
- I'm here because I'm called
to spread the message of God's love.
- No, you're here
because you've judged yourself guilty
and putting on that little outfit
gives you the power to drill that guilt
into everyone else and have them beg for the forgiveness
that you can never have.
And you're signing up to punish yourself for life.
Aren't you?
- I'm sorry if that's what you believe,
but if you really think that,
then I challenge you to come to mass on Sunday.
(Jake laughing)
- "Come to mass."
Week after week, drop a dollar in the hat
and send a billion to the Pope
so he can live in the most lavish palace on the planet,
tax-free.
- If you came, you would see
how much positivity people get from it.
A sense of community, man.
- Oh.
A sense of
"communion," eh?
All right.
[flicking lighter]
Let's commune.
We'll be
commun-ists.
You know,
as best I recall,
I don't remember the bible preaching
against this wonderful plant.
Smoke this with me and I'll come to Mass.
- Next Sunday.
9
A-M.
- And let's be honest,
after your sad little startup here, you need me.
- Yeah, I guess so.
Why, you do PR now?
- Game on!
(uplifting music)
(laughing)
Keep it burning! (laughing)
Yeah, dude!
- Yeah!
(laughing)
Oh, hold on, hold on.
- Whoo-hoo!
- Say, "cheese."
- Fromage!
- Nice.
- Whoo!
- Well, you want some pike?
- [Danny] Eh, Northerns aren't any good.
- [Jake] In the winter, they are.
- Think Nicole would want it?
As like a peace offering?
If we filleted it up or something?
- Although she is known to munch the tuna,
I'm pretty sure she's a vegetarian, so.
All right.
Back to your home,
little guy.
Oh...
Oh,
get in there. (Danny chuckling)
He doesn't want to go.
Whoo! Huh?
Hey, don't worry about the chicks.
I got something that will appease.
(dramatic music)
(shouting) Oh!
OH!
Whoo!
Yes!
Whoo!
(knocking)
Hey, Cass.
Danny, Cassidy.
Cassidy, the Deacon Daniel Sullivan.
- I was raised Catholic.
You could've given me communion.
You didn't have to act like a homophobic prick like that
in front of everyone.
- I'm sorry, I didn't think you were hungry.
(laughing)
- What the hell? (laughing)
- Girlfriend, we come in peace.
I have a present for you.
- Give it to me then.
- It would be better for the both of us
if I gave it to you in private.
(chuckling)
- You smell like fish.
- Oh, funny, I was gonna say the same thing.
Now this is just a little peace offering
from me and my brother, Daniel.
But I still need that hundred from the last one.
- I got...
$60.
- Okay.
Hey.
Even Danny toked a little.
- [Cassidy] Yeah, no ####.
- No, I did not.
- Said he's puff if I came to church with him next week.
(chuckling)
- I'm so sorry about church.
I just had everybody watching me
and a lot of...
restrictions
and policies that
a lot of individuals...
(laughing)
- You are so high right now.
(laughing)
- Don't, please don't tell anyone.
- We don't exactly hang out with the same people.
- You see? That's the problem.
And that is why Danny and me are throwing
a full-moon soirée this week, down at the fishing hole.
- Outside? Hell no.
- We're gonna have a bonfire, booze, tunes,
and there's always the little shanty
if you wanna warm up and get cozy.
- So, you're going then?
- Yeah.
Are you going?
You guys should go because it's gonna be fun.
(laughing)
- Okay, well, I'll bring the absinthe.
- Yes! All right!
Whoo!
(Nicole whimpering)
Should we smoke some of that? - Yes.
You're smoking us out.
- Come on, Cassidy.
- [Cassidy] All right, all right.
- Dick.
You are such a prick.
(somber music)
- So, you're selling?
That's your "work?"
- I provide a natural alternative to pharmaceuticals
for a select local clientele.
- [Danny] You're a weed dealer.
- You do realize I just fixed
everything with them for you, right?
Gotta make a living, amigo.
You coming? - I don't get it.
You were Mr. Honor Roll.
You were on the math team.
You're so smart and you coulda' done anything with your life.
It's just a little sad.
- I know you saw me at the nursing home last week.
- Yeah.
I should've said-- - That's no the point.
The point is, I was there because I bring medicine
to a sick 82-year-old woman whose medical treatments
sucked the life out of her.
And I bring her the only thing that makes her feel any better.
Let's her put food in her stomach.
Helps her sleep.
She would take a visit from me over one from you any day.
So save your holier-than thou attitude for the sheep.
(engine rumbling)
(tires screeching)
(somber music)
(dramatic music)
(fire crackling)
(ominous music)
(water bubbling)
(water sloshing)
(phone buzzing)
- Hello?
- Are you trying to kill me before the cancer does?
- Father Rob?
- [Father Rob] You got friends making a scene in Church?
You stood up the Marxes?
You got arrested
and the car's been impounded?
Am I missing anything here?
- Yes, no.
Um, no, you're not.
I wasn't arrested really.
- Even better question.
Do I need to pull out my I-V
and personally come over there
and knock some sense into your thick head?
- No, Father.
- I'm assuming you're going to wisely use your time
and you're gonna get it together for next Sunday
because chances are,
I'm not going to be able to make it again
and you're gonna be the one up there
in front of the congregation.
- Yes, sir.
- Now I expect to hear a glowing report.
Oh, hell.
Maybe I made a big mistake with this.
- No, Father, I-- - Don't talk.
Just fix it.
And for the love of God, Danny, don't #### it up!
- Don't F it up.
- [Father Rob] Yeah, that's right.
- Okay.
Bye.
(pleasant music)
? Now we'll make it up to you ?
? Anything you want me to ?
? The past is past, I can't undo ?
? So I will make it up to you ?
? What can you say ?
? Through all that you've done ?
? There's just no way ?
? Did you ever think for a moment about ?
? Your son, your child, your little boy ?
- He was too sick.
- Why aren't you holding confession today?
- That is one of the few privileges
I won't have until I'm ordained,
unfortunately.
You're welcome to visit Father Rob in hospice.
You know, I'm sure he would be--
- You're supposed to be helping out the Church
wherever you can, yes? - Absolutely, Mr. Sheraski.
- Then you'd have a minute to speak
to a parishioner in confidence, wouldn't you?
- I guess I could.
- Thank you, come on.
Let's go somewhere else though.
(clinking) This one's fertilizer.
(chuckling)
- Oh, man.
Is that Clarence or John Paul?
- I think they're identical. (tea pot whistling)
This other one doesn't look much better.
(toilet flushing)
- Don't!
- What?
- I could've taken him to Father Rob
for a blessing or a burial or something.
I don't know.
- Just get him a new one.
He won't know the difference.
- What did you want to talk to me about?
- Thank you.
I thought your homily was a bit clunky.
But I agreed with your sentiment.
- Thanks.
- There are some things I'd...
I'd just like your ear
and a guiding hand in prayer.
- Certainly.
- Dear Heavenly Father,
I was rude to this young man whose competence I doubted.
But I was wrong,
and see that he is capable of being
the leader we expect him to be.
He gave us directions to stay on the right path
and to keep your church sacred.
I, uh...
I, um...
Ahh...
Even at my age
and with a family,
I uh...
- [Danny] Go on, yes?
- It's a poison of the mind
but I can't help but dwell in impure thoughts
from time to time.
- That's a very common affliction.
- Can you help me purge these sinful urges, Daniel?
- Only God and a strong will can do that.
Let's pray together.
- Yes.
Please, let's pray.
- Hail Mary, - [Both] full of grace.
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus--
[kissing] - Stop that!
Pray for your-- pray for your sins.
- I'm sorry, I...
- Your best hope for salvation
is to seek God's mercy through reconciliation.
- That's why I'm here.
Go see Father Rob.
I can't help you.
- Thank you for your service, Father.
Deacon.
- I can't take that.
- [Bart] It's for the Church.
- Bart!
(engine rumbling)
(somber music)
- Hail Mary, full of grace.
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed...
What's this?
- A donation.
Why do you do it?
- Why do I do what?
- Give so much of yourself to the Church.
- Well.
(sighing)
That's...
That's between me and God, Daniel.
Whatever happened with Bart, I'm sure you did your best.
We've all got something, don't we?
- Yes we do.
- I shouldn't have to tell you this
but everything happens for a reason.
(ominous music)
- [Chris] I left my math homework at home.
I need the truck.
- [Danny] Find a ride with somebody else.
(dramatic string music)
- I miss you.
(doorbell ringing)
- [Nicole] Hey.
- Hey, Nicole.
- I figured you needed a ride.
- A ride where? - Well, it's a full moon.
You said you were going. Come on.
- Oh, yeah.
I'm sorry, I can't.
I got a hundred things to work on for Sunday.
- It's only Thursday.
You have all weekend to study your homework.
Cassidy's driving.
What's this?
- Oh, um...
This is Saint Christopher.
- Oh.
- He's the patron saint of travelers.
Jesus appeared to him as a child
and carried him across a raging river
with the weight of the world on his shoulders.
He's just supposed to keep you safe during your travels.
- Mmm, Christopher.
Come on. [laughing]
(chuckling)
- Will you have me home by midnight?
- Shotgun.
- Okay.
Okay.
(upbeat music)
(fireworks popping)
- Hey!
Who invited this narc?
(laughing)
Better late than never.
Come on, come on.
- [Cassidy] Whoo! Shotskis!
(groaning)
- Hey, Dan the man, you're in this too.
Let's go, let's go.
Okay.
Uno, dos, tres, down the hatch.
(gagging)
Whoo!
- What was that?
- That, my friend, is the finest
Canadian blended whiskey money can buy.
I'm sorry, does your ##### hurt?
Even Danny took it like a man.
- [Man] Danny, the derelict deacon, huh?
- Is that on a T-shirt yet?
- [Man] So what exactly is a deacon anyway?
- It's like an assistant coach.
- Okay, so like if the priest is Mike McCarthy,
then you're like Dom Capers?
- Good analogy.
(groaning)
- Jesus.
Between the two of you, it feels like a minority
to be just a regular straight dude.
- You guys.
- Just kidding, bro.
You still play?
- Do it.
- I need to warm up, literally.
(strumming guitar)
- If you're feeling warmer.
(laughing)
- Do you have a pick on you?
Thank you.
(strumming tune)
(plucking)
(strumming beat)
(strumming tune)
- [Nicole] Yeah.
Whoo!
(Nicole laughing)
- [Cassidy] Oh, yeah!
(strumming tune)
Come on, guys, is that all you got?
(people cheering)
(fireworks popping)
(strumming tune)
(fireworks screeching)
(people laughing)
(cheering)
(clapping)
(yelling)
(group cheering)
(fire sizzling) - Whoo!
- Anthony, goddamn it, did you piss in the fire?
- That's what happens when you put it on frozen water, dude.
- This is bull####.
- Where are we gonna go?
- Plan B. - Where?
(upbeat music)
You've gotta be kidding me.
What the hell are you doing?
- It's a big empty house,
ideal for hosting a gathering of friends.
- No! There's no way in hell we're.
Okay, okay, go, go, go, go.
Go, go, quiet!
Quiet!
If anything happens--
- We might accidentally have fun.
Oh, golly, gee!
(laughing)
- Okay, all right.
Coming through.
Okay, okay.
[groaning]
- What the hell?
- Hey, El Derelicto! - Give me that.
- It's all right, it's all right, I got it.
Hey,
it's all good, okay?
What do you need?
Here, have a malt beverage.
- Whose is this?
- It's mine.
You can have it. - I don't.
- No, no, don't be rude to...
the hot girl.
Who are you again? - I'm Stacy.
You guys are gonna play, right?
- Oh, yeah, just as long as I win.
Deal us in.
Hermano?
- You're lucky I'm not kicking everybody out right now.
- It's okay, darling.
Relax.
- Sir, ma'am?
- No, next round.
- I wanna make a toast.
(laughing)
Hey.
(shushing)
To my brother.
(faint beat music)
- [Man] Yeah!
(yelling)
(upbeat techno music)
- [Danny] I'm out.
- Mm. - Three sixes.
- No way.
- Read 'em, count 'em, and strip, sweetheart.
- Oh. - You were bluffing?
- [Man With Mask] Uh-oh.
- [Woman] You don't have to. - [Jake] Oh, yes, she does.
- I'll cover my eyes.
(laughing)
- Do I? - I took mine off.
- Let's see 'em.
(giggling)
(laughing)
Ah! - Clever girl.
- [Nicole] Thank you.
- [Man In Back] Who's dealing?
(laughing)
(gasping)
(laughing) (screaming)
- [Jake] What?
Come on.
- Babe!
- [Nicole] Danny!
- Yeah?
- [Nicole] Can you bring me my shirt?
- I don't know, my hands are pretty full.
- [Nicole] Come on!
- Okay, okay.
(faint beat music)
(laughing)
- Will you hook my bra up for me?
My hands are frozen.
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
- You get much practice with this?
- Only when the nuns need help.
I'm just kidding. (laughing)
(faint beat music)
[lips smacking]
[Nicole moaning]
[kissing breathily]
(Nicole laughing)
I'm...
(door slamming)
- Time to go, ladies, come on.
Time to go! Time to go!
Everybody, time to go!
Thank you, thank you!
Thank you for coming!
Thank you, time to go!
Time to-- - She's out, man.
What?
(upbeat music)
(party commotion)
(chuckling) What's the matter?
- Is Nicole gay or what?
- I mean, all girls are a little bit gay.
Nice, she just likes whoever she likes.
Why?
- Because.
(laughing)
- Anything to see my boobs, huh?
- Absolutely.
Oh, no, no, no, no!
(laughing)
Goddamn, girl.
- Revenge is mine, bitch.
- If you want me to take off my pants, just ask.
- You cheat at cards, so.
- I do not.
Do you have any dry threads?
- Yeah, upstairs.
Come on.
(muffled beat music)
- Mi casa, sub casa.
- God.
- Whoo!
Nice butt. (giggling)
- Hi.
(thudding) Ow.
Ah-hah-ow.
(chuckling)
- Sullivan sandwich.
Hey.
- What?
I barely got to see anything.
- I know.
Danny saw more than you.
- Oh, yeah?
Not ####### worthy.
(laughing)
- They're very pretty.
- Pretty?
- They're very nice.
(muffled beat music) (kissing)
(moaning)
- Danny.
Danny.
(party commotion)
(laughing)
- Oh, my God!
(upbeat music)
(muffled beat music)
(huffing)
(groaning)
(yelling)
(huffing)
[trying to catch breath]
(sniffling)
(party commotion)
(intense beat music)
(gagging)
(people groaning)
(people chattering)
(ominous music)
(doorbell ringing)
(knocking)
(groaning)
- Sorry.
- I should've even have to be here, Danny.
Where's my freaking chainsaw?
I need it.
- Oh, I'm sorry. - What's going on?
You look like a truck ran over you.
- Oh, yeah, I'm just feeling a little under the weather.
- I can ask Jake for you. - Is he here?
Let me talk to him. - No, he's asleep.
- You know what, forget it.
I don't need to talk to him.
Just have it back by noon, all right?
- Noon today?
- Yeah!
Today!
- It's down at the hole.
- Well, let's go get it then.
- It was right here by the wood.
- This is perfect.
A picture of your life.
Alone in the cold, surrounded by a bunch of trash.
Thank you for dragging me into it.
- You came looking for me, remember?
Dumb ass.
- You know, I prayed to Chris yesterday
to bring us closer together
and then Nicole showed up, out of the blue,
wanting to drag me out here.
That messed me up.
I wasn't gonna come.
- Do you hear yourself?
You got what you prayed for,
so I don't get what you're so pissed about.
- This isn't what I wanted.
- Well, I had a good time.
- All I wanted, Jake,
was for you to do something right for once and stop,
stop embarrassing yourself.
- You're the embarrassment.
Signing your life away over guilt
for something that you didn't even do.
- I am the reason that Chris got into that car.
- Yeah, well,
I'm the reason why he didn't have his homework.
- What?
- He pissed me off.
So I took it.
That morning
before we left.
- You never told me about this before.
What did he do to you?
- I don't even remember.
I was 15.
It's probably something stupid.
- So, what, Jake?
Chris dies and you say screw college?
Screw getting a job?
Screw my family, screw everybody?
- Pretty much.
- Why can't you get your #### together?
- You haven't stepped foot back here in years.
- You could've gotten out of this ####hole!
- I barely finished school.
What did you?
What was I gonna do?
Move with Mom and Dad to Phoenix?
You were halfway across the country.
At least I had friends here.
What did you expect?
- We were all crushed, Jacob.
We all had choices to make.
- Yeah, yeah, and yours was to ditch me
for a bunch of hypocrites and pedophiles.
- The seminary saved my life.
- No, the seminary saved you from living your life!
Yeah, no, you just had to make sure
that you were gonna be broke and alone.
So, I guess we have a little bit in common,
you ####### hypocrite!
- Don't call me that.
- The first girl who lays hands on you since college
and you're ready to dip your ####, Mr. Chastity.
- Shut up! - Or what?
You'll hit me? (smacking)
Huh? (smacking)
Come on, you little bitch!
Hit me. - Stop that!
- Come on, I dare you!
(groaning)
(thudding)
(yelling)
- Stop being a piece of ####!
(thudding)
(ice crackling)
(Danny groaning)
(ice crackling)
- Hey.
Come on, get up!
Come on, quick, quick!
(crashing)
(dramatic music)
(gasping)
- Jake!
(water bubbling)
(dramatic music)
[organ music]
- [Congregation] Our Father, Who art in heaven,
Hallowed be thy name.
Thy Kingdom come,
Thy will be done
on Earth as it is in Heaven.
(ominous music)
(water sloshing)
(gasping)
- Hang in there, Dan.
Stay with me!
Stay with me, come on.
Come on, buddy.
(hear monitor beeping flatly)
- [Doctor] How long ago was the epi?
- [Man] Two minutes.
(whooshing)
- Hey.
- [Sally] Is he?
- Where's Jacob?
- Oh, he's here.
Down the hall.
He's stable.
- I'm so sorry.
- No, no, no, no.
No, no, don't touch that.
- What time is it?
- After 11.
- It's Sunday.
- I hate to say this.
Especially now, since you're just coming around.
(chuckling)
This hasn't worked out at all.
Father Rob and I really wanted it to but--
- That's okay.
- Bishop Byrnes is sending up a new priest this week,
so we packed your things.
If they discharge you today,
you can make the four o'clock bus.
Oh, Danny.
You're a good kid.
We're just...
We're in a tough spot is all.
Best of luck.
(dramatic string music)
(groaning)
- They're talking about cutting them off.
What about you?
You got all eleven?
- I... blacked out.
- They say my heart stopped
for an hour.
- But, I don't get how we
got out.
- I just remember
trying to get air
and inhaling so much water.
Went dark.
I had some crazy hallucinations.
- You coulda--
- No, I didn't mean to--
- No, I'm sorry. - Don't apologize.
- It's not your fault.
You saved me.
- Dude.
- Marx?
- He says he found us on the ice.
- What?
I mean...
We somehow
climbed out?
- Yeah.
(plucking)
Nice brought it.
- So, they're shipping me off.
(laughing)
- They're firing you? - Essentially.
(chuckling)
- So, back to priest university then?
See that?
(strumming tune)
Man, this party's lame.
- When did you get good?
- It's been awhile now.
- The priest said you got hurt.
We hope you get better.
- It's fresh, just needs to be reheated.
- Mom, I wanna learn guitar.
- Sweetie, we can't--
- Do you give lessons?
- Oh, Nm-nmm.
Yeah, yeah.
I do.
Give me that.
- Give us a call when you feel up to it.
- Mm-hmm.
- Giving your number to a 10-year-old?
- That's my type, bro.
(laughing)
You know what I'm talking about, Father.
- Oh my.
(laughing)
You're sick.
(chuckling)
- Okay, here.
Help me out. - Okay.
- Tell Nicole to bring my ride around back.
- For real?
- I can't afford this ####
and I'm not sure I'm down with them chopping off my foot.
- You good? - Okay, yeah.
(dramatic music)
- Can you forgive me?
If I hadn't have dragged you out that night
when you wanted to stay and--
- No, don't.
- My horoscope said that something really small
was gonna turn into something so much bigger.
- Nicole, it's okay.
None of this was your fault.
(somber piano music)
- Are you sure?
- Just um...
be good to yourself.
(somber piano music)
(engine rumbling)
- Ow.
Oooh.
- So, what's next then?
- A four-hour bus ride.
Smelling dairy farms.
And then a #### storm from Bishop Byrnes
when I get back to campus.
- Sounds like a gas. - Yeah.
What about you?
- Probably smoke some bud.
Fire up the Nintendo while I wait to see
if my toes fall off or not.
(laughing)
- A pair of dynamic young prodigies.
Well.
- Stay out of trouble, Dan.
(bus engine rumbling)
(dramatic music)
(groaning)
- You know, I figured
I'd stick around for awhile.
Until the whole toe thing blows over.
Help you with some firewood
and kick your ass at Mario Kart.
- Okay.
(engine rumbling)
("I and Thou" by The Daredevil Christopher Wright )
? Woke up this morning ?
? I thought I'd been transformed ?
? My body turned to seed ?
? Grew up a wheat field ?
? To about the knee ?
? And that's all I'd ever be ?
? And I am looking for the thing in itself ?
? Not healing but health ?
? The other, not self ?
? The I and thou ?
? And I am looking for the thing in itself ?
? For meaning, not wealth ?
? The lover held jealously ?
? The I and thou ?
(pleasant music)
? Woke up this morning ?
? I thought that I could see ?
? The veil had been pushed aside ?
? The cave wall shadows ?
? The whole menagerie ?
? I turned and actualized ?
? I am looking for the thing in itself ?
? Not healing but health ?
? The other, not self ?
? The I and thou ?
? I am looking for the thing in itself ?
? For meaning, not wealth ?
? A lover held jealously ?
? The I and thou ?
? ?
- Aquarians is available
on Amazon Prime
and on Blu-ray
at Aquarians the movie dot com.