(program theme music)
(gentle music)
(children screeching)
? ?
(water splashing)
(woman sighs)
(alarm blaring)
(coffee maker whirring)
(distant coughing)
- [Laurie] Oh, that's cold.
- It'll get better in a second.
(Laurie sighs)
(birds chirping)
Johnson.
Say, Johnson.
Hello!
These reports are abysmal, Johnson, abysmal.
I don't know how our stocks got so low.
Well, I don't care about your excuses.
All I want to know is that the next fiscal quarter
you're going to work on it.
I'm looking at our stocks: it's two in the pink;
one in the stink.
Okay, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you,
I know... beautiful flamingo.
(lighter clicking)
(dog barking)
(lighter clicking)
- [Cam] I thought you quit?
- Oh, um... this is still quitting.
It's just sort of broadening the definition of quitting.
- Oh, okay.
(woman exhales heavily)
- Well, hi anyway.
It's been a--
- A minute? - Yeah.
What's up Goose dog.
- How's your, how's your mom?
(dog panting)
- What's his real name again, Sweden?
- Selsdon. - Selsdon.
- That's right.
- [Cam] It's from a play or something.
- Yeah, I remember.
- Well, you look... uh.
- Oh my work uniform? - Yeah.
You know it's not easy, but, uh, somebody's gotta do it.
Hm.
This is my grad school.
(Cam sighs)
Okay, well, bye.
- Yep, never not see you, maybe not.
- [Leigh] What?
- Double negative... I think.
(dog barks) Hey.
- [Leigh] Very charming.
- Come on Goose dog.
Yep.
It's, it's the wrong way.
It's the wrong way.
Bucko, come on.
- Bye Goose dog.
(phone ringing)
- [Dre] This is Dre, leave a message at the beep.
- [Leigh] Yo dude, it's Leigh.
Yeah, so my Mom was supposed to be coming with me
on this camping trip, but she can't come,
obviously, so, um, I don't really feel like going alone.
So, that's where you come in,
if you want to come, please do.
I'm gonna die.
I have a tent, I have everything,
literally everything, so, um, just let me know.
All right, bye, you dirty slut.
(Leigh breathing heavily)
- [Woman] You okay?
- I'm fine.
- [TV] We haven't always fired at them.
- [TV] For a time we tried to contact them by radio.
No response.
(Leigh blows raspberry)
- Look at you.
- I feel like you can see my butt in this skirt.
- Turn around.
- No, I know that you can't, I'm just being paranoid.
- Still, turn around, give me a turn.
(TV chattering)
Aw, my beautiful baby.
- You ever think it's weird to say that,
considering I look like a clone of you from yours 20s?
- No... it's not weird if it's true, honey.
(TV chattering)
- [Leigh] I'll back in the morning.
- Mm, have fun sweets.
- [Man] Is it one episode... it's hard--
- [Man] I'll pass.
(people chattering)
(woman laughing) - [Woman] Yeah, I know.
- [Leigh] I feel like a little nauseous.
- [Dre] Why?
- [Leigh] 'Cause, everybody from our high school is here.
- You, this is what you wanted.
- Okay. - No regrets.
- [Leigh] No.
- No regrets. - Oh my God.
- [Dre] You're gonna love this. - [Leigh] Okay.
- [Dre] You're gonna love a Wednesday at the Davis house.
(man laughing)
- What up Dre! - What's up, my man. - What's good!
- Yeah, quick question. Why you playin' beer pong in your movie theater, bro.
- Get out here.
(Dre laughing)
- Leigh... Michaels... wow.
- Hey, Davis. - Hey, it's so good to see you.
I haven't seen you in-- I haven't seen you in so long.
- Yeah, mm hm. - In forever.
It's gotta be like five years or something?
- Yeah, crazy right? - Yeah, crazy.
- Totally. - So crazy.
- [Leigh] Mm hm.
- Wow, crazy.
- Cool, so is this done now? No?
- I wanna, I'm takin' in the moment, you know. - [Leigh] Mm hm.
- It's important to me. - Yeah.
- [Man] Davis, you're up bro!
- [Davis] This isn't over, okay?
I'll be right back. This shot's for you!
- Can we go away from here, now please?
- Oh girl, hell yeah, come on.
(men yelling)
- Loves this. - Dude, I don't like butts.
- Really? - I like backs a lot though.
- [Dre] Backs?
- Yeah, the spine, the curvature of the spine
is beautiful, the muscular system
of the back is super intricate and cool.
And like, plus, that's what defines a dude's shape!
- Is his back. - Is his back.
- Okay. - It's not the front.
It's not the d##k. (both laughing)
It's his back.
? You know that's how love works ?
(party music playing from house)
(window banging)
(party music playing from house)
- Hey. Hey! - [Dre] Yo, what's up dude.
- [Cam] Yeah, long time, no, uh, hm.
Yep. - Yes indeed.
(Dre laughing)
Did you win beer pong?
- Yeah dude. - Oh, good job.
- Thank you.
(gentle music)
(both laughing)
(gentle music)
- [Leigh] Gonna grind up on this chimney.
[Dre] Dude, you're about to make that chimney hard as hell.
- [Leigh] I love making chimneys hard.
- Whoa! (gentle music)
- [Leigh] Please come camping with me, please?
- [Dre] Dude, I cannot. I have to go to work.
- [Leigh] I hate your f##king job.
- [Dre] Yeah, I do too.
I'm not sitting on a pile of f##king money, bro, I gotta go.
(both laughing)
[Bre] You know what? (exhales)
I got something for you.
Wait a second. - Okay.
If it's a butt plug, I'm gonna be really p###ed.
- [Dre] Dude, your ass would be lucky if I put a butt plug in it, okay.
- Okay. (snickers)
- All right, okay.
So I know I won't be there.
This will help you get through it my friend.
This will help you get through.
- Dude, what? - Hell yeah, dude.
- Where did you get these? - Burning Man, like last year.
- What? (Dre laughing)
They still gonna work? - Oh yeah.
Oh yeah. - All right.
- They were strong as f##k. - You're a god.
- I make dreams come true baby. Miracle maker.
(Leigh laughing)
(gentle music)
- What? - Bubble.
- Bubble, what?
Son of a bitch.
- [Laurie] Honey, it's okay.
I'm fine.
You're just tired. Don't worry about it.
Nothing happened.
- Yeah, okay.
- Leigh, I'm fine.
It's okay.
- Did I get you wet?
- A little, who cares.
- I do. [crying]
Okay, let's do it again. [sniffles]
This time I will try not, f##king killing you, okay.
(Leigh sniffling)
- Mm hm. (Leigh laughs)
- [Leigh] Are you dead? - Yes.
(gentle music)
- [Laurie] It's good for you to get away for a bit.
You've always loved it up there.
- [Leigh] What's the name of this nurse
that's coming around again?
- [Laurie] Mieshka.
She's really good.
- [Leigh] Says who?
- [Laurie] Um, Carolyn recommended her.
She took care of her niece for a while.
(TV chatter)
- Okay.
(upbeat music)
Who's turn is it. I don't remember.
- [Laurie] I'll go.
? Folks, I'm goin' down to St. James Infirmary ?
? Seeeeee... my baby ?
? She's stretched out on a long white table ?
? She's so sweet, so cold, so fair ?
(shoes thudding)
(coffee pouring)
(coffee pot thuds)
(door opens)
(approaching footsteps)
- That's actually not warmed up yet, I can.
(Leigh sighs)
(upbeat music)
- [Cam] Hey little lady, I can show you a good time!
- All right, but I'd have to charge you.
- [Cam] We can't both be hookers.
- Sorry, don't really have time.
I'm trying to find "Life on Mars" on my iPod
'cause it's a perfect song for leaving
and I can't freakin'--
(lighter clicking)
Thank you.
- No worries.
You, uh... you skippin' town Bug?
- Don't call me Bug.
(Leigh exhales)
You have plans for today?
- No.
- [Leigh] You have a job?
- Nothing permanent.
(birds chirping)
(dog panting)
- I like what your mom did to the kitchen.
- [Cam] What, like the tile, and everything?
- Yeah.
- [Cam] Five kinds of tile.
- [Leigh] Yeah, there's like five different kinds of tile.
- I literally just said that.
- What? - Nothing.
(Cam sighs)
- [Leigh] Did you count the tile?
Do you have weed?
- Uh, yeah, I wasn't, I was gonna, not, though.
- [Leigh] Can you bring it please?
- [Cam] Okay.
Do you mind throwing me some cash though, I'm a little tight.
- Oh, I'm sorry sir, you want me to pay you for your drugs?
- Yeah, no! No.
It's-- Never mind.
- I'll buy us whiskey.
Dude, I cannot believe you still have that tortoise.
- [Cam] What are you doing guy.
Come on, here we go.
- [Leigh] Remember we tried to get it drunk?
- I thought he would be dead by now.
He's still kickin'.
- You all set?
- Yeah.
Goose dog!
(gentle music)
? Strengthen your bones ?
? prepare for Korteplopet ?
? Share drink with your team ?
? Celebrate, you now earned it ?
- [Cam] Yeah.
- [Leigh] I need more twang.
- Okay, like a-- (guitar strumming)
- [Leigh] Yeah, yeah.
? Well I left my wife on the porch last night ?
? And then she disappeared ?
? I feel like she got abducted by aliens ?
? But I can't tell that from here ?
Did we close your garage? - Yeah. - You're sure?
- I think so. - You're sure.
- [Cam] We're not gonna go back and check,
so it doesn't matter either way.
- Okay, which one of these is gonna get me the most f##ked up.
- [Cam] All of them.
[TV chatter] - Or whiskey. Whiskey?
- Whiskey. - Whiskey. - Whiskey.
Why are we even playing with this baby stuff.
- Yeah? - Uh.
- [Cam] We should get like-- Oh, boy.
(both straw slurping)
- That girl's eyeing you.
- What girl? - The one behind us.
- Oh, bingo. - Yah.
- Okay... I think I'm gonna go for it.
- Yeah, I think you should. - I think it's love, huh.
- [Leigh] Congratulations, yeah, I think that you really should.
- Don't laugh. This is my future.
Watch Goose. Okay.
- Okay.
- Hi, how's it goin'?
I was just, you know, passing through.
Hitting the rest stop.
I saw you lookin over here.
Oh.
Okay.
I got you.
Uh.
Good to see ya.
- [Leigh] That looked like it went really well.
- [Cam] It was super... super bad.
- [Leigh] So, when's the wedding?
- Actually, be at your guys' wedding.
She was lookin' at you. - No, what? No, I had no idea.
- [Cam] She said you were, you know, smiling at her?
- Well, I'm known for my sunny disposition, so.
- You set me up! - I did not, I genuinely thought
that she was checking you out. - [Cam] Hm.
- Look, my radar is terrible, I'm sorry.
- [Cam] Mm hm.
- Damn though, I really would.
I'd be down. - You should get in there.
You guys would look great, like little scissor action.
- You know that scissoring isn't actually a real thing, right?
- What?
- Oh, did Mama just shatter some fantasies for you?
Ohhhh.
- You won this round. - Who said we're competing?
- You did when you tricked me into talking to her.
- All right, game on player.
(upbeat music)
- [Park Ranger] Hey, so, here is a map of the loop.
- [Leigh] Loop. - Follow the curve down
and then you will find the bathrooms.
Keep going for three more posts.
And there's where you're gonna be. - Okay.
- Now, we haven't seen any bears.
- Oh my god, I love your nails! - Oh, thank you.
- Those are so great. Those are acrylic, right?
- Yes, they are.
Always cheer me up, make me feel fancy.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
(car horn blaring) - Oh, oh, gotta get movin'.
You two enjoy your little slice of heaven.
- Thank you. - Thank you.
- [Park Ranger] Oh, hi.
- [Cam] You know I forgot that you do that.
- [Leigh] Do what? - You know how you always try
and strike up conversations with strangers.
- Oh, yeah.
I mean we're all human right.
- Yeah, I guess.
(dog panting)
I just forgot that you do that.
You know our site's in the lower loop, right.
- Yeah, I'm just trying to remember if we forgot anything.
- Okay, can you drive forward while you do that?
(gentle music)
(car door bangs)
Yeah.
That's better.
- No, no, don't help.
- I'm going to. - Okay.
(gentle music)
And just like that.
- Okay, I don't know how to do this. (laughs)
And then disengage the rain fly pole, which we did. - Mm hm.
You're looking at removing it. - Oh, disassemble.
- That's the disassemble. (Leigh laughing)
I know, I know.
- What are you doing?
- I'm trying to see if Tinder works out here.
- Woof.
- It's for the game.
It's for the purposes of the game.
- Oh yeah, for sure dude, for sure.
- Yeah. Oh.
(crickets chirping)
(window knocking)
- No?
- Uh uh. - Nothing?
- Okay.
(Cam sighs)
Did you see this Bigfoot sticker, though?
- [Cam] That's really good.
Have you seen him? Have you seen him?
- [Leigh] I've seen the Lord.
All right, no bonfire.
So how do you want to do this?
- Um?
I want to sleep for a very long time?
- No, I mean, like I can sleep in the car if you want, or?
- Oh no, no, don't be dumb.
- Okay, yeah, that would have sucked, so--
Groovy.
(dog snoring)
(people chattering)
(phone ringing)
(people chattering)
(birds chirping)
So how long ago was that?
- [Cam] Uh, a few months ago, like five, maybe.
- [Leigh] Damn, that sucks man.
- [Cam] Yeah, you know, I wished she'd left me for a dude
or something, like not a corporation. - [Leigh] Mm hm.
- 'Cause that just means that I was less entertaining
to her than some like, boring nine to five job,
a Christmas bonus, you know.
- I mean, that's like, not what it was though, right?
- No, what do you mean? - Like you can't blame somebody
for wanting to pursue their calling or whatever.
- [Cam] (groans) Yeah.
- Mm, maybe it was just bad timing.
- Or maybe she was using it as an excuse.
- Yeah, maybe?
- No, that's really what I think it was.
- Does it matter?
- [Cam] (sighs) I guess not, but--
- It doesn't. It's hard either way. It doesn't matter.
- Sure, yeah, but, okay.
But if she'd left me for a guy, I could beat him up.
Or, if she was like exploring her sexuality--
- [Leigh] Come on Cameron, come on.
- Or whatever like, I could lie
and say we were hell at threesomes, but you know,
it's not like I'm gonna stop using Google
as a peaceful protest, whatever.
- Okay.
- I just don't really know what to do when that happens.
You know, like, I'm just supposed to go back
to like normal life?
Uh, yeah okay, this is done now.
- [Leigh] Know where to put it.
- What?
- The pain dude, the pain.
(gentle music)
- Catch!
You coming?
- I want to say yeah, but isn't that weird?
- On the contrary, my dear.
I've seen your jubblies; I've see your p##sy so many times.
It's like wallpaper now. I won't even notice it.
- I've always wanted a man to say that to me.
- Sexy wallpaper. - Mm hm, that's better.
- Come on!
Live for the thrill!
Gotta? - No. - No?
- I'm gonna let you have this one. - Okay.
Enjoy the view.
- Yep, there he is.
Oh Jesus, Cam.
(Cam groaning) - Oh.
Oh!
Yes.
- I honestly. (laughter) - What?
- You always think you have such a great ass and it's really--
- [Cam] I do though! - No, you don't.
- [Cam] It's perfectly proportioned.
- It's fine. It's like a fine butt. It's not anything great.
- [Cam] I'm thick and I like it. - Okay.
- Nice, real. - Got steel fingers over here.
- There we go.
There we go. - Okay. (Leigh yelling)
We're doing this now, is that what we're doing.
(Cam yells) (Leigh yelling)
(both yelling)
(Leigh laughing)
- When I was a little kid, and my family would go camping...
my Dad before bed would tell me and my brother these stories
about these two kids on this planet called Toasteron.
(Cam laughs softly)
Yeah, it was really just my brother and me,
um,
and they'd get into all kinds of trouble you know,
but like Indiana Jones type of trouble.
Like, they'd always end up okay.
And I used to pretend that I couldn't sleep
to have him keep telling stories.
(gentle music)
- I used to do that with you.
When you'd scratch my back.
- (laughing) Really? - Yeah.
(both laughing)
'Cause you were so good at it and I liked it so much.
I'd just lie and say I wasn't tired.
- Do you want me to scratch your back right now,
is that why you're bringing this up?
- No. - Are you sure?
- Oh. - Okay, turn around.
(sound of a kiss)
Sorry.
- [Kids yelling]
(gentle music)
(birds chirping)
- [Cam] So I think I might have redemption for our game?
- [Leigh] Hm? - [Cam] Some girl at another campsite just checked me out.
- [Leigh] You sure she was checking you out? - [Cam] Like 100% sure.
Like bone zone.
- All right, show me what she did.
- Okay, she was like.
Ah, "Hi."
Like that.
- Was she cute?
- [Cam] Hello? I'm not shallow.
- Come on.
- Okay, yeah she was pretty insanely hot.
- [Leigh] All right, good job.
- Okay, do I get a point or?
- Okay, yes, you get 1,000 points, okay.
- Okay, well how many did you get for rest stop girl?
- [Leigh] 1,000, too. I'm gonna go walk Goose.
- [Laurie] Hi, you've reached Laurie,
I can't come to the phone right now,
but if you leave a brief message after the beep,
I will call you right back. Thanks, have a good day, bye.
- [Leigh] Hey, it's me, I'm sorry that I missed your call.
I was not looking at my phone
which is the point of camping, I guess.
Um, what else do you want to know.
The fire still looks the same.
Camping is still, you know, the same thing.
Anyway, love you.
I hope you're sleeping right now.
Love you, bye.
(Goose panting heavily)
(Leigh laughs)
- Where the f##k did you go? His hips are really bad.
You can't walk him for that long.
- Okay, relax, I carried his fat ass half the time.
- I didn't know you guys were going on like an actual hike.
- Sorry, should have been more clear.
(people chattering)
What's up dude?
- Are you still with that guy?
- Who, Davis?
- What, no! Ew.
Did you hook up with Davis?
- No.
- 'Cause that'd be, eeeew.
No, no, the one guy, the other guy, furniture guy.
- P.T. - P.T.
- Yeah... uh... kind of, I guess, you know.
I don't really know, it's like a lite thing, you know.
L-I-T-E, relationship lite.
You cool?
- I don't know if you had to call him, or something.
- I was texting my Mom.
- You know, he seemed really nice...
when I saw you guys at the Kingfish.
Very stately. - Right? - Yeah.
Like he could for sure be a politician
if he wasn't such an artist.
- Why do you do that? - What?
- [Cam] You make fun of people for caring about things,
for being driven.
- I don't know.
Probably 'cause I'm not anymore.
- What's the plan, for the rest of the day?
- I don't have one.
- If you were up here alone, what would you be doing?
- Searching for my soul.
(Leigh laughs) - No way.
- Yeah, Dre had some left over from Burning Man,
so she gave them to me. - Let's go!
- Right now? - Right now, yeah.
- Right now. - Right now.
- Okay. What about Goose?
- He'll, nah, he'll be fine. Right?
- Why are you asking me, he's your dog!
- [Cam] He's, ah, forget it. (laughs)
- Oh! - Ah ha!
- Woo hoo. - Welcome to the water place.
(water whooshing)
(Cam yelling)
- Ow. (Leigh laughing)
Whoops.
Please don't splash me. That's disrespectful.
(Cam yelling)
(gentle music)
(Cam yelling)
- [Leigh] Cam!
- [Cam] Yeah!
- Come here.
- [Cam] Okay.
- It's a corn graveyard.
- You look like a farmer. (laughing)
- I am a farmer. - Nope.
- This is all my land.
- We're so intense.
- Yeah. (laughs)
Yeah. - Hey.
Fire... on fire.
- [Leigh] Uh huh, yeah.
- Fire on fire.
Fire on fire.
- Yeah, on top of more fire.
- More fire. (Leigh laughing)
- I didn't realize I knew you by heart.
- I think I'm coming down.
- Me too.
(birds chirping)
- [Cam] What.
- [Leigh] It ends really cool.
And the dog is where?
(Leigh laughing)
Uh oh.
(Leigh laughing)
Goose! - Check the tent.
- Do you want to check the tent.
- Check the tent. - Okay.
Oh, hey Goose! (tent zipper movement)
No.
(Leigh laughing) - Where is he!
- I don't know, maybe he's takin' a bath! (laughs)
- Can't just lose Goose, come on.
- Okay, I'm comin'.
Hey Goose! - Goose!
- I miss him.
- You're not helping!
- I am, Goose! - Goose.
Oh, I can go talk to the ranger.
- Yeah. - I'll do that.
- Okay, okay, thank you.
- Which way are they?
- Up, I don't know.
Goose!
(Cam groaning)
F##kin' of course.
F##k!
(groans)
- [Woman] Hey, are you looking for a dog?
- Yep, the big fat, f##kin' lazy s##t.
- [Woman] Is it a pug dog? - Yeah, have you seen him.
- Oh, Jamie, it's his dog!
- Oh, God. - Good, yay!
He's so energetic! - You scared the crap out
of me you dumb, adorable, stupid dumb, dumb.
- Don't worry, we'll find it. Where was the last time you see it.
- It was it our site. - Okay, Site 53, right?
- 53, yeah. - Okay, don't worry.
I'm gonna call somebody and I'll get, oh, it's locked, okay.
- Can I get you guys anything as a thank you?
Like we have three bottles of whiskey if you want one.
- We are having a wine night tonight at our cabin.
We're just gonna open a Rose and talk.
- [Woman] Sit by the fire if you wanted to come to that?
- You know, yeah.
I would, I would like to do that.
Totally. - All right, take it easy.
- Yeah. - Yeah, you too.
See you later. - Yeah, see you tonight.
- Bye.
Huh.
- Okay, so I talked to the ranger.
What? Where was he?
- He's a pimp. He was at the site with the hot girls.
- Oh, my god.
- Yeah. - Goose pimp.
Goose pimp.
- I can't believe we got him back.
- Me either. - What a pimp.
- Were the girls pi##ed?
- No, not at all.
They invited us over for wine, actually.
- Oh.
- What? - Nothing.
They just find your dog and then invite you over for wine.
- [Cam] Yeah, I guess.
(crickets chirping)
What ya doin' pal? (gentle guitar music)
- [Leigh] Okay, so I've been writing you
the worst song I could possibly write.
- [Cam] Oh, I'm so excited.
- Um... and I'm thinkin' like, picky.
- Mm. - And like croony.
- Like? (guitar strumming)
- [Leigh] Yes. - Oh, so sad.
- Yes.
[Cam] ? It's a beauti-- ? (laughs)
- If you could take your art seriously,
that would really be good to me.
[Cam] ? It's a beautiful day to break your heart ?
- (laughing) Yes.
? Lookin' past the racks of cold beer ?
? For a brand new start ?
(Leigh laughing)
? I've missed your face when you're not around ?
[Cam] Really, really good, original.
- I know.
? Mostly fell from grace ?
? Their angels are on the ground ?
(both laughing)
? Lay your wings ?
? I'm tired of laying down angels ?
? Los Angeles, Los Angeles ?
? Just smile ?
(laughing) Wow.
Yeah, that time, it's about that time I went to Los Angeles
and I had a really profound experience.
- Why are you talking about the things that I wrote?
It's about the time that I went to Los Angeles.
- Oh, I own this now. - And I got so high that I scratched a rental car.
(Leigh blowing)
- You comin'?
- Nah, I owe my mom a phone call.
- [Cam] Okay, well I'll flip my hair for ya.
- Live for the thrill.
- [Cam] Yeah, it's all I do.
(Laurie speaking faintly)
- Mm hm.
When did that start?
Okay, did you call Dr. Becker?
No Mom, you're supposed to call him,
that's what he's there for.
- It's like, nothing bad has actually happened to me,
so like, when I do feel shi##y, it makes it feel less valid.
- I get it. - Yeah.
- Yeah, I get it.
You know what, sometimes I wish
that something bad would actually happen to me,
because I just want to know if I could handle it.
- Yeah. - I don't want to get like Elizabeth Smart-ed
or anything. - No.
- [Janie] But, something substantial.
- I will.
Okay, good night.
(Leigh sighs)
I wish I was a witch.
(fire whooshes) (Cam screams)
(both laughing)
- [Cam] Ooooo.
(Leigh laughing)
You could totally be a witch!
(Leigh laughing)
- What? - You could be a witch.
- [Leigh] Yeah, but that would take so much effort.
- Yeah, yeah, yep.
- Witch's brew.
- My favorite.
Ah.
(fire crackling)
- Are you afraid to die?
Just, you know, it's completely new
and different for every person.
Reached the point where we've felt
all the possible feelings we can feel
and it's the last new thing we'll ever experience.
- You're pretty morbid these days.
- I think I've always been.
I think I'm just saying it out loud now.
Plus you kind of have to be when you're dealing with my mom.
It stops becoming something, you know.
It's like so far away.
And it's just sort of there every day.
It's like a third person in the house.
(laughs)
You don't necessarily like it, but it's there.
Try as you might to get it out of there,
it will still come back.
That's the thing, you know.
It always happens.
It just doesn't happen this f##king slowly.
It's like watching someone rot above ground.
(crying) Dammit.
Come on.
Witch's dance.
(Leigh humming softly)
(Cam whistles)
[Leigh] ? I went down to St. James ?
? Infirmary ?
? Saw my baby there ?
? She was laying on a cold, hard table ?
? So white ?
? So cold ?
? So fair ?
- [Cam] (mouths trumpet sounds)
? Doo, doo, dooo ?
? Br, br, br ?
? Br, br, bah ? (both laughing)
- Oh. (Cam laughing)
(fire crackling)
[Cam] No! (Leigh laughing)
Ooh. (Leigh laughing)
Okay.
Yeah!
(crickets chirping)
- [Cam] Good night, Bug.
- [Leigh] Good night, Bug.
(gentle music)
(kids chattering)
- You get it. (girls laughing)
- Do you get it. - Oh, my God.
- Want some coffee?
- Sure.
- Hi.
- I'm Leigh.
- Hey, girl.
- We've heard so much about you.
I'm so sorry about your mom.
That is so hard.
- Thank you.
- You want some java?
- So, how do you two know each other?
- We used to date.
Yeah, we dated in high school.
- High school and college. - Most of college, actually.
- You guys are so strong, I, I mean,
I could never be friends with my ex. - Oh no.
- Every time we see each other we f##k.
- (laughing) F##king Dillon.
I am not a fan of her ex-boyfriend.
- I'm gonna go feed Goose.
Thank you guys for the java.
- I killed the vibe.
- No, don't worry about it.
- [Jess] She is like super intimidating.
- I know.
Is she like really sad?
- What's goin' on?
- Kind of want to get home.
- Because of? - My mom has this cough
and I think it's gonna turn into pneumonia or something.
- Okay, when did she get the cough?
- I don't know, says she's had it for a few days.
- Weren't you with her a few days ago?
- Yeah, must not have heard it. - What's up Leigh.
- [Leigh] Nothing.
Just don't really see the point in staying.
- Okay. Why?
Can't we like hike or something?
We still have a whole pint of guacamole.
- I don't really want to sit around and eat condiments with you Cam.
- You seemed fine doing that yesterday.
Also, guacamole's not a condiment!
- I paid for this whole trip, right? You're just a ride along.
- No, that's absolutely not fair.
- What do you want to do? O Captain, my Captain!
The love of my life.
My faithful, faithful friend.
- Don't bring that up.
- It's just that you leaving me this morning,
to go hang out with two dumb sticks
felt pretty goddamn familiar.
- You don't know me anymore, Leigh.
- (laughs) I just thought
that I mattered a little bit more to you,
you know, not just a f##king sympathy play for p###y.
- Why the hell am I here?
- Because I saw you on the street.
- Really?
- I can't say that I missed you, or I wanted--
You don't get to win like that.
- [Cam] It's not about winning.
(Leigh laughs softly)
- You know why you feel okay saying that?
It's because you won.
You wrecked me, Cameron.
You shattered me.
And now, you get to go and tell the tale
of your sorry little ex-girlfriend
and her dying mommy to Marabel and Agnes over there.
(birds chirping)
(cabinet bangs)
(Leigh whimpering)
- Hey.
- Hi.
- I get told all the time I'm too forward.
- Don't worry about it.
- Well, I'm pretty intuitive
and I could tell you were kind of mad right?
- I, uh, I don't really think
that I was trying to hide that.
- Um, well, I'm sorry.
- I'm not mad at you.
I don't even know you.
- I can still be sorry.
- That doesn't make any sense.
- I really do hope your mom gets better.
(gentle music)
- Thanks.
- I'll see you later?
(people speaking faintly)
I can rent Cabaret from the library when I get back.
You want to?
Okay.
(dramatic music)
(people chattering)
(dramatic music)
(people chattering)
(Cam groaning)
(gentle music)
(people chattering)
(thunder rumbling)
(gentle music)
(rain drops spattering)
? When I was young I had no answers ?
? Always coming up for air ?
? Always cutting my own hair ?
? Running into doors now ?
? Because you are not around ?
? Naked as the sun goes ?
? I am falling down ?
? You push me ?
? I am the boulder ?
? Spin me out of control ?
? 'Cause I cannot handle ?
? Gettin' older ?
? So tumble me down, down, down, down ?
(vocalizing)
? Hey, I'm at a loss for words again ?
(music fades)
- [Cam] S##t.
? And it's only cause I think I've reached the end ?
- [Cam] Think you forgot anything?
? And do we have to settle down? ?
- Guess it doesn't really matter either way.
- [Cam] Yeah.
(people chattering)
(gentle music)
- Well, um.
- Yeah.
Yep.
(Leigh laughing softly)
Thanks.
- Yeah, no problem.
Thank you.
- Yeah, hm.
No worries.
(both laughing softly)
(gentle music)
? You push me I am the boulder ?
? Spin me out of control ?
? 'Cause I cannot handle getting older ?
? So tumble me down, down, down, down ?
(vocalizing)
(Leigh snickering)
(Leigh laughing)
(Leigh crying softly)
(Leigh laughs softly)
- You dead?
- Yes.
(Leigh laughs softly)
(birds chirping)
? I went down to St. James Infirmary ?
? Saw my baby there ?
? Stretched out on a long white table ?
? So sweet, so cold, so fair ?
? Let it go, let it go ?
? God bless her ?
? Wherever she may be ?
? She can search the whole wide world over ?
? And she'll never find a man quite like me ?
(upbeat music)
? You push me, I am the boulder ?
? Spin me out of control ?
? 'Cause I cannot handle gettin' older ?
? So tumble me down, down, down, down ?
(gentle music)
? Why do we have to face this in our lives? ?
? Are we running out of time? ?
? Oh, oh ?
? Are we running out of time? ?
? I don't know why ?
? Oh, oh, oh ?
? Oh... ?
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