1	00:00:03:24	00:00:07:15	My son Pewehsen has been
2	00:00:07:17	00:00:10:17	in the spirit world for
fifteen years now.
3	00:00:10:19	00:00:14:23	In the beginning
I was broken-hearted.
4	00:00:14:25	00:00:19:05	They had a
healing sweat for me
5	00:00:19:07	00:00:20:28	because I really--
I really was in bad shape
6	00:00:21:00	00:00:22:21	after he died.
7	00:00:22:23	00:00:25:29	And in that sweat,
his spirit came
8	00:00:26:01	00:00:28:17	and he said, "Ma,
I didn't do that on purpose."
9	00:00:28:19	00:00:32:02	He was in his lane
so he went this way
10	00:00:32:04	00:00:33:24	and the guy corrected
and they hit.
11	00:00:33:26	00:00:35:16	And the other guy
was drunk.
12	00:00:35:18	00:00:38:03	I believe that
13	00:00:38:05	00:00:42:10	but I still struggle
that it was suicide.
14	00:00:42:12	00:00:46:13	So even if it
ended up being
15	00:00:46:15	00:00:48:04	some accident
16	00:00:48:06	00:00:50:04	he felt
very upset.
17	00:00:50:06	00:00:53:02	And he said,
"I'm just going to end up
18	00:00:53:04	00:00:55:10	in prison
the rest of my life."
19	00:00:55:12	00:00:59:07	And that's how down he was
on himself.
20	00:00:59:09	00:01:01:29	What happened
after he died
21	00:01:02:01	00:01:05:05	was they immediately
went into motion
22	00:01:05:07	00:01:08:16	and started talking circles
with our kids
23	00:01:08:18	00:01:11:23	so that nobody
would follow him.
24	00:01:11:25	00:01:13:19	And all of a sudden
sweat lodges were appearing
25	00:01:13:21	00:01:15:14	and lodges.
26	00:01:15:16	00:01:17:09	Because of
his death
27	00:01:17:11	00:01:19:13	the culture
came back.
28	00:01:19:15	00:01:22:19	I guess he was sent here
for fifteen years
29	00:01:22:21	00:01:24:09	for that reason.
30	00:01:24:11	00:01:25:29	So everything I do
is pretty much dedicated
31	00:01:26:01	00:01:28:13	in memory of my son.
32	00:01:30:21	00:01:33:25	We are starting over
in this community.
33	00:01:33:27	00:01:36:20	We have had
no clan mothers
34	00:01:36:22	00:01:38:06	for many years,
no identified.
35	00:01:38:08	00:01:39:22	I am Molly Miller.
36	00:01:39:24	00:01:44:06	I am an elder and helper
in my community
37	00:01:44:08	00:01:46:16	and I have been
38	00:01:46:18	00:01:48:24	named
a clan mother.
39	00:01:48:26	00:01:51:02	In this way,
by declaring
40	00:01:51:04	00:01:53:06	that clan mother
41	00:01:53:08	00:01:55:22	that now other clans
will step forward
42	00:01:55:24	00:01:58:03	and will appoint
their own clan mothers
43	00:01:58:05	00:02:00:06	because we have to
start over.
44	00:02:03:07	00:02:06:01	It's been recognized
for many years now
45	00:02:06:03	00:02:08:23	that the boarding school experience had a major
46	00:02:08:25	00:02:10:15	impact
on our people.
47	00:02:10:17	00:02:14:00	You know, taking the Indian out of them or attempting to.
48	00:02:14:02	00:02:16:02	We had that
early historical trauma.
49	00:02:20:23	00:02:23:22	We try real hard to hang on
to that community feeling
50	00:02:23:24	00:02:28:13	but those things that happened a long time ago
51	00:02:28:15	00:02:31:10	there's a pain in you, and there's a hurt
52	00:02:31:12	00:02:35:01	and there's a anger.
53	00:02:35:03	00:02:36:25	And you know
people will say
54	00:02:36:27	00:02:38:20	"Well that happened
a long time ago
55	00:02:38:22	00:02:41:06	so why do you still
hang on to it?"
56	00:02:41:08	00:02:43:13	But that's what we mean by historical trauma
57	00:02:43:15	00:02:45:13	it's still
in there.
58	00:02:45:15	00:02:50:02	[drumming and singing]
59	00:03:09:11	00:03:11:13	I know the kids are watching
us adults and what we do.
60	00:03:11:15	00:03:15:03	I want them to have
a better example
61	00:03:15:05	00:03:19:04	so I'm trying
to be that for them.
62	00:03:19:06	00:03:21:04	I don't always
like to dance
63	00:03:21:06	00:03:23:09	but we know that
those kids are watching.
64	00:03:35:02	00:03:38:16	"So the rule here
is a circle is sacred.
65	00:03:38:18	00:03:39:29	Who you see here,
what you hear here
66	00:03:40:01	00:03:41:12	when you leave here
67	00:03:41:14	00:03:43:10	let it stay here."
68	00:03:43:12	00:03:46:26	Right now we've started
a women's group.
69	00:03:46:28	00:03:48:26	We're a
matrilineal society
70	00:03:48:28	00:03:52:20	and it is the
elder women's responsibility
71	00:03:52:22	00:03:56:03	to take care
of our community.
72	00:03:56:05	00:03:58:03	We're talking about
just grassroots.
73	00:03:58:05	00:04:00:19	What can we do
to make this community better?
74	00:04:00:21	00:04:04:23	My granddaughter came to me
and said one of the kids
75	00:04:04:25	00:04:07:23	she goes to school with
said she's just
76	00:04:07:25	00:04:10:08	feeling so down
and she's feeling suicidal.
77	00:04:10:10	00:04:12:22	"Gramma can we
have a talking circle."
78	00:04:12:24	00:04:17:06	"Yes, we can."
79	00:04:17:08	00:04:20:21	It's a tough transition to realize you are an elder.
80	00:04:20:23	00:04:23:07	It's not
about age.
81	00:04:23:09	00:04:26:10	It's not because you're 65, you're an elder now
82	00:04:26:12	00:04:28:01	and deserve respect.
83	00:04:28:03	00:04:29:23	Respect goes
both ways.
84	00:04:29:25	00:04:34:00	So we have a responsibility
back to those young people.
85	00:04:34:02	00:04:36:28	You know I'm still trying
to find out
86	00:04:37:00	00:04:39:05	my purpose in life.
87	00:04:39:07	00:04:41:05	But I live
88	00:04:41:07	00:04:43:18	as a native grandmother,
a teacher of the language
89	00:04:43:20	00:04:46:26	a teacher
of history.
90	00:04:46:28	00:04:48:26	I'm a
community helper.
91	00:04:48:28	00:04:51:05	Healer in
the mind and heart.